I have been putting so much pressure on myself. The job is ending in May, I currently have unlimited overtime and I personally pressure myself that every hour unworked is $31 (after tax and 401k) 'lost'.

I have been working between 10-20 hours of OT a week, but it just isn't always possible or healthy for me to do.

Two weeks ago, I worked 24 hours of OT. This last week, I was planning 20, but life kept popping up. I started stressing myself out and my anxiety and health made it known.

Monday - I worked 4 hours of OT (because I was able to work remote that day). I also had a panic attack - my first real one versus just high anxiety in about 6 years. Not pleasant.

Tuesday - I worked 2 hours extra. I was fighting a cold and was also prepping for a last minute interview on Wednesday

Wednesday - My very flexible boss let me start work at 6am and end early so that I could go to physical therapy (for a reoccurring issue) and for a 2+ hour interview and still have an evening with my husband for Valentines day. He made steaks at home and it was so nice!

The interview was strange (its been a while) and stressful and I definitely feel that neither of us (the job nor me) were good fits with each other. Still - good practice!

Thursday - I had a horrendous day at work (high maintenance people). My husband was trying to help me and wanted to use a gift card for dinner out. I wasn't feeling my best, but thought getting out was a nice idea, so we had dinner out and when I came home, I couldn't force myself to do any overtime. At this point, I definitely had a cold or something.

Friday - My work announced a 3 hour paid early out for the holiday weekend. Payment of OT changes with this type of perk, so I was already sick and just said "for my health, I am abandoning any goals of OT for this week". My husband was happy to hear that. I was still sick, was able to get out of work at 12 and since I was to pick up my daughter from daycare in the afternoon, I chose to go to the movies.

Took 2.5 hours for myself and watched Black Panther. It was such a good movie!

Brought my daughter home after, my husband made dinner & I went to bed early.

Saturday - I spent the day on the couch or in bed sick. I still was feeling like it was more of a cold/bug than anything else, but I wasn't feeling any better.

Today, I woke up and it was like a truck hit me. I went to the urgent care up the street. An antibiotic and steroid later, my severe sinus and ear infections are being taken care of. $7.50 for copays for the meds. I will get a bill in the mail for the visit later.

Tonight, my husband is going with friends to see the same movie I saw on Friday. My daughter and I are having girls night. That means my behind is planted on the couch watching old episodes of Monk and my 2 year old is playing with some of her Little People toys. I broke out some resale ones I had bought at a deal and was saving for such an occasion. Hours of independent play for her!

Tomorrow is a bank holiday. Technically, we are off work. However, I will likely do a little OT - the only OT I will do this week though. I need to get healthy.

Still on for the job search - Work has given us access to a company that helps with the process and I was able to have my resume reviewed. I also am doing some webinars regarding personal branding, etc and am getting that resume out there!